Our good friend and pastor Rocky McKinley said it best:
“If you show me two people who are trying to OUT SERVE one another, we will show you a healthy and vibrant marriage.”
That’s so powerful!
Marriage isn’t about keeping score or waiting for your spouse to make the first move. It’s about diving headfirst into the beautiful, sometimes messy, always worth-it mission of loving like Jesus. And what did Jesus do? He served. He washed feet, He carried His cross and He laid down His life! If that’s not an example of servanthood, we don’t know what is!
Never forget that Jesus told husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church and laid Himself down for it!
So what does “out-serving” look like practically?
1. Say the magic words — “How can I help?”
And mean it. Whether it’s picking up the kids, folding that Mount Laundry, or just being a listening ear, showing up counts.
2. Pray together — even if it’s awkward at first.
Holding hands and talking to Jesus together is way more powerful than scrolling side-by-side in silence. Trust us on this one.
3. Laugh — a lot.
If you can laugh through burnt dinners, surprise bills, and weird habits, you’re winning. Humor is holy glue.
4. Brag on each other.
Text your spouse something sweet. Hype them up in public. Remind them they’re loved, seen, and still fine.
5. Make “serve first” your new motto.
It’s not about who did what last, it’s about loving each other SO BIG!
Recently at a marriage conference, a man approached us and said, “When we got married, we made the commitment to love each other like we did on day one of our marriage!” That’s a great goal and they seem to be doing great at living that out! What a difference that kind of mentality makes!
Marriage isn’t 50/50 — it’s 100/100. In fact, it should be 150/150! Both of you, all in, out-loving, out-serving, and out-laughing each other every day.
